Republic of Shalampax
An Inane Island in an Insane World
 

Books

With the exception of the pages on this Web site (and many people question them), no Shalampaxian has ever written a work of non-fiction. The reason is that we are convinced that the words "lazy," "indolent," "lethargic," "slothful," "idle" and other synonyms could have been invented only by an early linguist who met our ancestors; and we haven't changed at all in that regard. Because it's much easier to make stuff up than to do research, the sole book author among us, Rottencoconut, writes only the most trivial of inconsequential fiction.

Rottencoconut's most noted and longest novel is Rottencoconut Takes a Vacation. It is a fictional (of course) account of what Rottencoconut would like to do if he should ever get up off of his ass long enough to take a vacation. Because his idea of the perfect vacation is to walk around the perimeter of Shamalmpax's National Palm Patch (see geography), something that would force him to knock less than five minutes off his normal 16 hours of daily television viewing, it's a rather short book. Amazingly, he managed to stretch the narrative to 12 pages of admittedly large type. The title, copyright, acknowledgements, "about the author," "other books by" and promotional blurb pages fatten the book somewhat. Rottencoconut Takes a Vacation is currently out of print, but the publisher is considering reprinting it and making it available in the Shalampax Web store. Visit the store often to look for it.

None of Rottencoconut's other works are as substantial as Rottencoconut Takes a Vacation and arenít anywhere close to being worth noting here. Nonetheless, don't give up hope. He is still an active author. If, at some unlikely point in the future, he manages to pull himself away from his television long enough to write another book that expands beyond a paragraph or two we'll note it here.
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Shalampax and Shalampaxian are trademarks of Klebanoff Associates, Inc.