Republic of Shalampax
An Inane Island in an Insane World
 

Coat of Arms: Motto

Coat of Arms

Most countries translate their mottos into Latin before placing them on their coats of arms. However, no one here knows Latin and we sure as hell weren't going to pay a money-grubbing translator to interpret it for us, so we left it in English.

We adopted the motto "Inanity Triumphant Forever" after International Buffoons' Travel Magazine named us as the silliest country in the world. Any serious person would have considered that to be an insult, but, to be honest, the label is well deserved. In addition, we felt that it was much more honorable to be silly than to suffer from the condition that is prevalent in most other countries and, particularly, in their governments, namely insanity. We originally penned the motto as "Shalamapaxian Inanity Triumphs Forever over the Rest of the World's Insanity," but we would have had to get a much bigger Coat of Arms to fit that all in while still making it legible. The larger size would have cost us more, so we shortened it to the current "Inanity Triumphant Forever."

As it turns out, our choice of words was a mistake. Shalampaxians are not known for their vocabularies. Well, that's not exactly true. We are known for our vocabularies, but we are known for our vocabularies being so small as to make serious, meaningful conversations next to impossible. Consequently, few Shalampaxians know that "inanity" and "silliness" are synonyms. What's more, because Shalampaxians' reading habits are usually worse than their vocabularies, most of our people sloppily read the motto as "Insanity Triumphant Forever," rather than "Inanity Triumphant Forever," which, of course, is the opposite of what was intended. We took up a collection to come up with the funds necessary to change the motto on the Coat of Arms, but we raised only $1.72. That wasn't nearly enough so our prime minister at the time used the money to buy herself a cup of coffee instead.

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